So my esteemed "follower" Glamour Whore makes a valid and accurate point about the Shelf in my last post...Which leads me to yet another rant - why can't men just make a decision???
I dated a married guy for some time some decades ago (please reserve judgment for a later date) - beyond my own stupidity, why oh why couldn't he just man up and say "I'm never going to leave my wife?" No, instead he did and said the exact opposite....which ultimately led to me breaking it off....Of course it did, because I made the decision....
Same thing with ex husband - got pretty fucked up due to mother's death month after we were married, acted out in some of the most horrible ways which will likely be a cleansing blog some other day but nevertheless - why couldn't you just say I'm fucked up, I'm sorry, I gotta go? Nope instead he stuck around saying and sometimes doing the exact opposite yet again and in addition to all the disrespect, bled me dry financially...
Now the boy - same thing - so I'm on the shelf - I get that...But don't say/do stuff otherwise - don't get into an argument with me because I refuse to discuss who/what I'm doing and then say you don't care and its not going to break your heart....Don't send mixed signals (which again is a whole separate blog as well)....
Bottom line is even in all the scenarios above Girl has to be the strong one, Girl has to make the decisions, Girl has to stick to the decisions and you know what? It's damn tiring! Everyone who knows me knows I am a survivor - you know what? It sucks being a survivor - its a thankless job...I want to be the basketcase for once...Or better yet I want to meet a boy who says what he wants and his actions follow....UGH
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Glamour Whore here again...with a big fat...THANK YOU!!!! Oh Thank God u said it, being a "survivor" is a thankless job, and God forbid u ever have a moment where u say "I can't handle this", people go crazy!! Once u earn the title of "survivor" people expect superhero-esque strength from you on a daily basis. 24/7/365. I'm in a situation (non-men related. family issue) that I stated at the top of my lungs "I CAN'T HANDLE THIS. I'M BREAKING DOWN" to no avail. They said, "That's impossible. You are the strongest person I know". Grrrrr... As much as we would like life to be something we don't have to "survive" for just a week or even a month, it's not in the cards. We will always have to "survive" romantic turmoil, family drama, career aggressions, financial struggles etc and we'll look good while doing it but at least we know we are in good company. Each other. I'll believe u when u say u can't do it, and u'll believe me. We'll be by each other's side, keepin each other alive. Most likely with cocktails...lol. As for "The Boy", take urself off the shelf, live ur life..and live it how u wanna live it. When he makes up his mind, he'll just have to hope u haven't found ur knight in shining armor that knew what he wanted already...and when u wanna cry like the mere mortals we really are(unlike the superhero's people think we are), U can call me;) I am not undecided, I already kno I want my Blonde Ambition in my life and will drive all night to help out my fellow "survivor"..xoxo
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